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My Story. Thank you Thirty Seconds To Mars


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#1 Ardeur

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Posted 02 September 2011 - 11:46 AM

I saw something like this on this area and I wanted to put my story forward and to say thank you to Jared Leto, Shannon Leto and , Tomo Milicevic.

I am currently 15. In 2008 I was sexually abused in Switserland by a horrible man at the age of 12. let say nearly rhaped. Anyway... In 2010 I told the police. This was HUGE for me HUGE. I only told the police becuase of other people. To keep them safe as he was a cadet leader. I had a video interview so hard not to cry through it. (Only telling you this so you know why im ill today) I told them anything. It was one of the hardest moments in my life. A month later I get a knock on the door from the police. They welcome me with a "Your gonna tell me it didn't happen aren't you'?" Great meet and greet hey? Anyway I was rather supserouse then. The only thing I can remember of that day was really there harsh words. The room was filled with "Many teenage girls make things up to get attention" " The other girl invloded said nothing happened" " When we took the man in he said nothing happened and fell off his chair in shock. We belivie him and the girl" "We don;t want him on a register if he dosent deserve it. Please tell us if he dosen't deserve to be on this register." I wasn't lying and the next year proves it. Anyway the case was closed and as many people do he got away with it.

From then everything went downhill. My mood went my self confidence. In November I started to Self Harm to cope with things. In Febuary I became suicidal and started hearing two voices one called Beth (The bad voice) The other Lucy (The good voice.) Its like having a demon and an angel in your head.

In Febauary I was watching an eposide of Coach Trip, A UK Program. It was the final eposide and everyone was saying there goodbyes. The songs 'Kings and Queens' came on. I was jumping around in my seat getting into it singing along even though I've never heard the song before. I was nearly crying not becuase of the eposide but becuase of the music. It meant so much to me. I googled the main words "Kings and Queens" and got up "Kings and Queens" By Thirty Seconds to Mars. I listned and loved. Looked on another video A Beauitful Lie loved it and it went on from then. My love for this band was growing so quick whlist my life was crashing down.

I was left alone a lot during Febuary 2011. My mum had no idea what I was going through. One day Beth (The bad voice) was being a pain whislt I was left alone., My body felt like it was being controlled. Anyway I ended up in the kicthen with a knife against my chest. Beth was yelling Lucy was yelling I was stuck in the middle. coudln;t feel a thing. I put the knife down as Lucy got stronger headed for the toliet and just locked myself in it to keep myself safe. There was a war in my head. After neaarlt an hour I got out the bathroom and headed upstairs. Put thirty Seconds to mars on to save me from myself. It worked.

My school counselor reffered me to CAMHS. Stands for Child and Adloscent Mental Health Service. No onenew about the voices then. I got my first worker and she was horriblr! Won;t say much about her. Got my second worker and she was lovely anyway. After a few weeks going into a mental health hospital came into the converstation. A week later I was told by another doctor "No way! That won't happen" Then again another week and I was told "Yes I was going into a hospital the next day!" I cried and cried being away from my family. Everything but Thirty seconds to Mars have kept me alive since then. They where my distracction and still are.

Thirty Seconds to Mars had taught me to be myself!

I'm still in a mental health hospital 10 weeks later. Thirty Seconds to Mars have stopped me self harming stopped me wanting to die stopped me running away from the hospital. They have and are making me recvoer they are changing my health around. I have improved and being discharged soon. I wouldnt have been able to do it without Thirty Seconds to Mars.

Even though i haven;t seen them live I dedicate my life to them and the Echelon. Jared, Shannon, Tomo You have saved my life! You have turned my health around with your amaing words. I have made braclets with I fell apart and got back up again becuase I WILL GET BACK UP AGAIN! With you guys help. I will! (In tears now)

I wish you could see this anyone who could make sure they see this It would mean teh world to me. The world. I want them to know how much they have impacted on my life in just a year!
Can anyone help me with this?

Anyway, you;ve helped me improve helped me surive. You are my life!

Thank you!

#2 Chloeee'

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Posted 02 September 2011 - 12:49 PM

this girl is my friend, i had no idea how much you've been through - i self harm too, and just like you, i use 30seconds to mars to get me through most days. iloveyou, and im always here for you <3

#3 Fatima F

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Posted 02 September 2011 - 02:39 PM

I'm stunned...

First of all, I'm happy for you because you deserved this peace and I don't believe you could earn it any other way but from the music of Mars. You've been such a brave girl and you'll reach the best one day or another. But there had to be a trigger, a step forward and that's what Mars does, that's what they've done for all of us. Giving us hope to go on, singing words that you think no one has ever thought of but you. So yes, they are special!

I see you've already accepted to join us on making the scrapbook and I PROMISE you, I'll make it happen and we'll hand it to the guys. You deserve to be heard and they deserve to know how they've affected our lives and hear our appreciation.

#4 Ardeur

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Posted 03 September 2011 - 01:37 AM

View PostFatima F, on 02 September 2011 - 02:39 PM, said:

I'm stunned...

First of all, I'm happy for you because you deserved this peace and I don't believe you could earn it any other way but from the music of Mars. You've been such a brave girl and you'll reach the best one day or another. But there had to be a trigger, a step forward and that's what Mars does, that's what they've done for all of us. Giving us hope to go on, singing words that you think no one has ever thought of but you. So yes, they are special!

I see you've already accepted to join us on making the scrapbook and I PROMISE you, I'll make it happen and we'll hand it to the guys. You deserve to be heard and they deserve to know how they've affected our lives and hear our appreciation.

Hey. Yes I will be putting this in the scrapbook. Its amazingly awful how your life can just fall to peaces in a simple year. Mine certianly has. I hope your okay and have found hope again with Mars as we all have or are doing right now.

Take care

#5 maayanrosen

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Posted 14 September 2011 - 10:21 AM

Wow.
As I was reading this I was just stunned - It's terrible what you went through and I'm so sorry. You've been through so much.
But I'm also glad, because your doing better, as you most certainly deserve, and that's the most important thing.
You're improving - and you will beat this.
The band is practically what kept me together and helps me struggle as I'm also trying to overcome falling into pieces.
Their music is so unique, they have power to help us overcome and give us hope, like no one else can.
I'm also trying to find a way to let the band know how much they mean to me.
The idea of the scrapbook is wonderful and I hope our stories will reach them so they will know how grateful we are.
Tack care, be strong and the power of Mars will help you heal.
You will beat this.

#6 Ardeur

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Posted 22 September 2011 - 10:28 AM

Hey, i dont no what you've been through but im alwyas here for you. You can beat whatever your battle is. You are in control of your life not mental health. I know you can beat this and so does all the Echelon, Jared, Shannon and Tomo.Keep your head held high and smile. Smile is the best cure for mental illness.
Take care

#7 danabeaton

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Posted 27 October 2011 - 09:28 PM

I don't know where to begin. First I admire your strength for telling the police - even if the assh*les didn't do sh*t - and for telling us. Even doing that shows that you're fighting :) I really admire that.
I'm so sorry for what you had to go through. I've had my own struggles with mental health and while 30STM weren't really in my life at the time, I can totally understand how they helped you. A lot of musicians and special, inspiring people helped me fight my problems. And 30STM NOW help me continue.
I'm happy for you that things are starting to get better and I hope they continue :)

#8 AcrobatMary

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Posted 05 November 2011 - 11:45 PM

their first album helped save my life so i kno how you feel & i just wanna wish you lots of luck in your future. You can beat this.

#9 Macy

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Posted 22 November 2011 - 04:33 AM

Sadly people go through this every day, all over the world. It's great to know that she found that being herself is the best thing that she can do, and that she can now talk to people about what she's been through. A lot of people can't, because they're too afraid, too tormented. I was one of those people too. Not everyone finds something they can hold onto through the rough times, but the ones that do are very lucky! I'm sure Mars has helped a lot of people around the world, both with their music and passion. But just know there's also a family with it that will help everyone of you through everything!

#10 -Shade-

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Posted 22 November 2011 - 06:35 AM

I am always said that music makes miracles!!

Thank You being so brave to told that to all of us and the police and then get help yourself! I cried here a little bit but I just want to say to ARDEUR that you will survive.


And first of all i wanna say all you who is dealing with mental health issues that never be shamed to get help!! I was and tried to kill myself four years ago.Then I listened  alot of Beutiful Lie and those lyrics was like shot in my brains. I wanted to stay alive and feel normal. Now i'm healing and got power especially from30 Seconds To Mars. But because this wasn't my first problem(IŽ'm about 30-year old) and I listened music always there was before other artists who made me feel more powerful

I am so thankful  also about that that all you told your story so after (maybe) a couple of year you can read it here and think that Thanks, i went through it and I'm feeling so happy now.

#11 Nanny

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Posted 22 November 2011 - 10:34 AM

Hey Ardeur.... I just read your story and it touches me very much.... i have been through nearly the same thing. i was raped too and my Mom didnt bather helping me through this and i didnt have enought money for a lawyer so the guy came free on top of that 2 days later a dear friend of mine died.I thought i would never be able to have a normal life again(i didnt want to have a life anyways) i thought that i would never be able to love again. i started hurting und cuting myself aswell and one night i was sitting in my room and a friend of mine sent me the song THE KILL. at first i was like watever and i wanted to delete it without listen to it. but then i changed my mined and the song changed my life.Anyway wat i wanted to say was that there will be many moments in your life where yo will have the thought about giving up, but then u meet,see, Feel or hear something/someone that  chaneges your life and gives u strength to go on even if its just a song ;). i wish you all the best in the world and NEVER EVER forget who you are and dont let anyone tell you that "u cant"..... love and greets Natalie




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